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Galau 2025

 Dear Aku, 

udah lama nih aku ga curhat di sini. Entahlah. Makin ke sini makin jarang banget kita ngobrol ya.. padahal kalo mau, banyak banget loh yang bisa kita diskusiin, atau sekedar ngegabut ajaa.. 

And yes, as you know, AMU program has been finished since July last year. Even though I didn't get a good score, I tried my best. And then I took IELTS course at UI my score remain still. 5,5 for general. 

This is our first time in 2025, yeah. It's been a while. I can tell I changed a lot. I'm not a person who loves read a book, I'm not a person who likes writing a diary as well as story as I used to be. Here I am, just an average girl with tons of laziness and excuses. 

Dear Love, 

I just don't understand myself anymore. I don't know how to tell you. I want to be back to myself as I was a decade ago. The day that I can write anything, even just nonsensical things, imagination, or even my odd poem. I was quite ambitious back then. I had a big dream. I used to want to travel around the world. 

I had a big curiosity, and I had a hobby of reading in my pleasure time. Here I am now. Wasting my time playing a game, and something unuseful. I thought I had been doing something good for myself, as I wish to get a scholarship this year (2025). Turns out it was something delusional. 

What i can do with my 5.5 score band? even I apply for a scholarship within the country, it is not enough. 

I wish, I worked hard for it. Even though I can't get 8 band score, I will be happy for 7 band score. 

I tried the simulation grammar for the A1 level and couldn't fulfill my wish. I didn't get well. it is shameful.. when I took the speaking in exit test, I often said something redundant. It is not appropriate if you want a high score. 

I am desperate now, stuck in the corner here. 

image from: dreamstime.com


 

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